Not Exactly Overheard, in the grocery store:

me: (after bumping into elderly man's cart) I"m so sorry!
man: I"m not. (he smiles.) I say, to hell with it!

That guy is SO COOL.

The Effect of George W. Bush on College Age Republicans:

on the bus:

"I want social ties to form... no better way than to feed people and get 'em shit-faced. I want the first month of the club to be like a frat rush."

-blonde girl on bus w/ "GOP" bag, discussing plans for the College Republicans club next year.

okay, then. Just stay off the coke, all right?

The airport:

"You've already placed your spring order, I assume?"
-man with packets of paper, labeled 'EXCAVATOR BUCKETS'
(because using Excavator Buckets from the Fall season would be SO gauche...)

Target:

"Mom! Can you look in my ear??" -random concerned kid

Also at Target: chick, approx. 27 yrs., hauling around her unfortunate 4 year old son... hundreds of teeny long fake white acrylic braids and a super-orange fake-bake, complaining to someone on her cell phone that she "hates fat people". Excuse me? I'd rather hang out with the entire membership of Overeaters Anonymous than your fake orangey-streaked self, Wannabe.

Some things are better seen...

Impeccably dressed man in airport, reading a Xerox'ed copy of the New Yorker... cover and all.

Man on airplane directing an imaginary orchestra with carrot sticks, ocassionally in front of a reflective cabinet in the back of the plane.

Man wearing 'QVC Studio Tour 97' t-shirt. QVC went on tour? And this guy was there! (Please pardon me, I am truly fascinated with infomercials and other home shopping options... not to buy anything, I just think they're really interesting. )